Scott
by Zevus
Summary: When Nate's whiskey bottle gets sick the Leverage team doesn't know what to do.


"They're kind of like your children, aren't they?" Sophie chuckled.

Parker, Eliot, and Hardison were playing a game of monopoly in the bar, while Nate and Sophie sat at a table nearby.

"I had a child once." Nate whispered, a wicked look in his eye.

Sophie was a little scared for a moment.

"HAHA I WIN. SUCK IT!" Parker jumped up and down, throwing the monopoly board at Eliot's face.

Hardison was in a bad mood. "I always win against the computer."

Nate was drowning himself in the whiskey. His current bottle was named Scott, he had already finished off Larry, Bob, and Richard.

Eliot gave a small cough. Then another. And another. "Eliot, are you okay?"

"Fine." Eliot said, practically coughing up blood.

SUDDENLY

Scott started to seizure. He flew off the table and shook on the floor, spilling alcohol everywhere.

"Don't worry, it was just a chicken bone." Eliot held up the bone that was lodged in his throat. He stopped when he saw the bottle.

"SOMEBODY CALL A DOCTOR."

* * *

"We have a new patient." Taub placed a practically empty file on House's desk. "Scott Ford."

House glanced over the file, squinting his eyes. "You're hilarious." He said, throwing the file at Taub.

Taub caught it, much to House's dismay.

"Actually, I think they're serious."

"You mean Wilson and Cuddy? You'd think they'd come up with a better joke."

"No. The patient's "family."

House gave him a look. "What do you mean, "family?" We're talking about a whiskey bottle."

"Well, obviously. But these people seem to treat it like it's real."

"Hm." House pretended to concentrate hard. "We'll treat this like any other patient."

"You can't be serious."

* * *

Scott was sitting in the middle of the bed, a blanket pulled over most of him except for his face. Sophie sat in the chair next to him, and Parker was busy trying to figure out what Scott's vitals were.

Nate was on the floor, handcuffed to a chair, foaming at the mouth. He wasn't handling his detox from alcohol well. "WHISKEYYY."

"It doesn't look good, Nate." Eliot said, staring at Scott.

"WHISKEYYY."

Hardison was busy searching the web for a possible explanation for Scott's condition. "Nothing." He said, slamming his laptop shut.

Chase and Thirteen appeared at the door. "What the hell?" Chase questioned, staring at the bottle. "_That's_ Scott Ford?"

"Yes."

Thirteen was too busy eying the strange man growling on the floor. "Are you sure that's not our patient?" She said, pointing at Nate as he ripped open the chair cushion.

The Leverage crew looked at her like she was an idiot. "Of course not." Parker stared at her and Chase. "Don't you doctors know anything? That's just Nate. Nate isn't sick, are you Nate?"

"WHISKEYYY."

"Excuse me." Sophie stood up. "May I talk with the dean of medicine here? I feel it may help Scott's treatment."

Now Chase and Thirteen were looking at her like she was an idiot. "Sure. Whatever." Chase backed out of the room, feeling that these people were severely messed up in the head.

Thirteen soon left also, and Sophie began her journey to Cuddy's office.

"How did you do it, Sophie?" Eliot asked the grifter as she walked back into Scott's room, informing them that Scott would get the best treatment PPTH could possibly provide.

"Nothing really." She said, blushing. "I told her I was going to kill her baby if she didn't."

"Genius." Hardison praised. "Nate, how do you feel about Sophie's method?"

"WHISKEYYY."

"I thought so too."

Foreman inched his way into the room, followed closely by Taub. Foreman had heard of these people's mental issues, and wasn't too eager to see them first hand.

"Where exactly do I put the drip?" Taub looked up from Scott, holding the drip tube in his hand.

"I guess in the bottle itself." Foreman guessed, and Taub dropped it in the bottle. It still had some day old whiskey in it, and drip just added to the quantity of liquid.

"Will he die?" Sophie questioned.

"He's already dead. Actually, "he" was never alive to begin with." Foreman stated.

"You mean he died already? OH NO. Not this soon!" Sophie cried.

Foreman facepalmed, and remained like that for a few minutes as Sophie tried to explain Scott's death to Nate.

"Nate. Nate. Can you hear me? Scott is dead. Scott's gone. He's gone."

"WHISKEYYY."

"I'm so sorry."

"WHISKEYYY."

"I'll let you grieve then."

"WHISKEYYY."

Sophie got up and looked at Foreman and Taub. "The hospital will be expecting a lawsuit soon."

"YOU CAN NOT BE SERIOUS." Taub screamed. "This must be some sick joke." He nudged Foreman. "It's a joke right?"

"I don't think so."

* * *

Sure enough, the next day a document was sitting on Cuddy's desk saying the hospital had been suid. When she got home later that day, she found that Baby Rachel was missing; the only thing left was a note telling her she had two choices and that she chose the wrong one.

After a major lawsuit battle between The Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital and Leverage Consulting & Associates, the PPTH suffered a huge blow and was forced to shut down completely. After all the doctors were either transferred or fired, local hospitals stripped PPTH of all it's medical supplies and equipment, taking as much as they could grab.

A funeral was held not far from the now abandoned hospital, and the whole House team attended, along with Wilson and Cuddy. Sophie gave a long speech about how the deceased would be greatly missed, and the Leverage crew took turns stepping up to the mic.

The whole crowd hushed as Nathan Ford slowly walked up for the final speech. Cuddy looked at everybody with anger and resentment, hating the Leverage crew for stripping her of her title.

Nate gave a small cough to clear his throat, and finally opened his mouth to speak. The crowd looked at him with wide eyes, wondering what he will say to honor Scott.

"WHISKEYYY."


End file.
